Watch the virgin cop versus the despondent cop during Nitehawk’s May Day celebration of The Wicker Man (GET TICKETS) this Thursday. Until the on-screen battle begins, it’s a virtual showdown between The Wicker Mans as Hatched compares hair-dos (Christopher Lee obviously wins), lovely ladies, and animal outfits. Let’s go…

Caryn: Christopher Lee’s hair…

christopherleeshair

Kris: Nicolas Cage’s hair…

nchair

Caryn: Britt Ekland…

brittekland

Kris: Leelee Sobieski…

leelee

Caryn: Ingrid Pitt…

ingridpitt

Kris: Crap. Uh…. Molly Parker. Yeah, let’s go with Molly Parker

006TWM_Molly_Parker_005

Caryn: Short versions, long versions, rumors of print cuts buried underneath freeways, The Wicker Man surely has a complex history that’s nearly as engrossing as the film itself. See more here.

Kris: According to a 2013 interview, Nicolas Cage claimed that he and director Neil Labute were “in on the joke” during production. Cage also claims that he wanted his character to have a pointy mustache and a stiff suit but the producers stopped him, which is the biggest goddamn shame I have ever heard.

Caryn: Those masks (sweet paganism)…

masks

Kris: That bear suit (sweet misogyny). Cage punches four women in The Wicker Man. Well, that’s not true. He karate kicks one of them.

95a5af4e-3609-4eef-b952-96e3196df8ec